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Wash your hands


So I went to see "We're The Millers" at the movies last night and at one point I went to the men's room.  Ok Actually I went to the Family Bathroom because the men's room was 36 miles away on the other side of the Cineplex.  However the Family Bathroom was directly across from theater 14 where I was watching the flick.  So I opened the door and it looked pretty good, I pulled it closed and locked the door.  YUCKO!!!!! EWWWW the lock was kinda wet and sticky.   I am not usually a germ-a-phobe but now I am freaking out.  I always, ALWAYS use a paper towel or something to touch locks and handles after I wash my hands in a bathroom.  So now I am torn, wash now or pee because I really gotta go and as I age my bladder ain’t what it used to be, you know.  So I go, lefty because my right hand is certainly contaminated, meanwhile I am leaning back like that rapper Fat Joe to turn on the hot water.  My plan is to get my hands into almost boiling water as fast as I can after I am done.  I ran the water for damn near two minutes and it was nearly room temperature.  So now I am thinking, how do you fight MRSA… where is the sanitizer?   None!  So I look for paper towels and there are none, it’s the electric hand dryer.  Even that was jacked up…the air in it was from Antarctica.  So now I have icy cold wet hands and nothing to be a barrier for me when I unlock that same sticky lock that started all this.  Is it just me?  Do you avoid touching things in a public bathroom?  

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